A servant's heart

I never intended for this blog to be just about my trip to Thailand.  But, when I returned I struggled with what to write, since pretty much everything I thought about included thoughts on the trip.

In real life, I struggled with how to explain what had happened and what I was feeling.  To top it off, each day, I struggled to choose courage - let alone write about it.

So what caused this post?  Two weeks ago my father-in-law asked me to speak at his ABF hour about a servant's heart and how my idea of serving changed because of the trip to Thailand.


Afterwards, I thought, I need to share this - so here we are.

I hope that you learn something new, about yourself, about serving...

Many of us say that we serve.   We teach Sunday School, work with Children, take care of our church property, or provide Meals for those in need.  And we do.  I do – I lead our children’s team every Sunday morning, I take meals to families that need them, I do whatever my church asks.

This year – I re-learned what it means to serve.  A year ago,  I was approached by a member of my church – her words, well to be honest, they scared me.  “God told me to tell you about a trip I am taking….”   Over the next few weeks, as Lisa and I spoke, I researched, and I prayed – I knew God was telling me to go to Thailand with Lisa.  Once we made the decision, it was as if all of the little tugs, hints, and pushes were coming together to say “See, this is what I was trying to tell you.”

 

I couldn’t really picture how this would go and how it would change me.  In retrospect, I can see some very specific items that I would like to share with you.

1.           Don’t assume you know anyone’s story –
We met Nic (17), Jewel (16), and Bella.  We learned that for many of these girls, they were doing what was expected of them.  In their culture, their religion, it is up to the girls’ to support the family.  In anyway they can.  Yes, some of these girls may have been there voluntarily, but because they didn’t know of any other way.

Photo by Kristen Torres-Toro

Photo by Connie Rock

2.           You can understand their story-
     Bella, who was not the normal “skinny” girl from Thailand, pulled us into the outdoor bar she worked at.  Every night she would smile, encourage her co-workers and reach out.  Bella kept telling us, “You are Beautiful”.  She told one of the girls, “You understand, you are big and beautiful.  Like me.”   Part of Bella’s story was like many women I know – struggle with other’s perceptions of her body and her body image.

Photo by Kristen Torres-Toro

Even if you can’t directly relate to someone’s story – you are in that place for a reason.  You have a hurt or a victory that means you can understand their pain, if not the reason.

3.           Live missionally-
You never know when you will be given a chance to speak with someone.  We spent time in local restaurants, shops, and businesses.  We got to just talk to people.  Hear their stories.  Some had left the red light districts, some were working wherever they could to support their families. (Single moms supporting kids, young men and women supporting their parents.) Many with broken hears.
     
And, you never know where that conversation, that love will go.   How will it touch them? Will it help them come to know Jesus?  You don’t know.  That doesn’t mean you don’t tell them anyway.

When I returned I struggled with the same thing that many others have struggled with.  How do I take what I learned, what changed me and put it into practice?

First, it changed my mindset about how I was already serving.  I still serve in my church – I miss all my kids when I am not there ;)  But I no longer see it as a “have to” but a “get to”.  I am blessed to get to check-in and talk to 60 kids every week and their parents.  To touch their lives in that way.

Next, it reminded me of something – we aren’t called to just serve the church.  One of my friends calls it “serving the saved and blessing the blessed”.  And aren’t we?  Who did Jesus minister to? The church?

So, I started to search.  Each of us would have our own areas of service.  I was touched by the women in Thailand that I reached out to a women’s shelter in my hometown.  They have their own counselors and daily individuals – but their women need real life skills!

Have you thought what every day skills you have, that maybe you take for granted that someone else would not?

Last, I remembered to Live Missionally
1.           Every day I interact with people that I know – but do I take the time to get to know them? Their pain, their fears, their stuggles?  Do you?
2.           Every day I interact with people that I don’t know – waitresses, store clerks, other travelers, but do I take the time to get to know them or do I let fear get in the way.
3.           Do I let the fact that I may not see the outcome (will they turn to Christ or won’t they) keep me from reaching out?

Picture from Investingcaffeine.com

 

When we went to Thailand, our leader Connie kept saying – “Don’t expect to see a girl walk out of the bar life.”  In the best scenario, we would introduce the girl to one of the local partner organizations who are there full time.  She reminded us that in her 8 trips – she seldom even saw those girls again, so she, and we, would need to remember to leave it in God’s hands.

We have to treat many of our every day interactions the same way.  We may not know if and when someone turns to Christ – but that should not stop me from reaching out to them, from getting to know them, from sharing with them.

And sometimes, you just don’t know.  Remember Big and Beautiful Bella?   At the beginning of November, Connie sent the May team an email.  She was back in Bangkok and had walked into one of the local partner organizations.  She sent us a picture… of Bella, no longer working in the bar, but instead, learning a new skill.

 So, a question - what is your heart?

It has been a while....

It has been 6 weeks since I returned from Thailand.  And, while I never intended for this blog to be strictly about Thailand, that is where my mind has often been.

I often find myself remembering big things, like our nights spent in Patpong.

Photo courtesy of Connie Rock

The memories of the people that I met there remind me of a learning and growing time and friendships I will never forget.

Photo courtesy of Connie Rock

The places that we saw, the cultural differences remind me that we live in a melting pot.  Our own country is filled with many other peoples, some of different nationalities, some of different beliefs, but all of us different.  It amazes me that I needed to go to a different country to realize that.

In the last 2 months, I have had one overriding thought.  How do I live lessons learned in another place, half a world away, in my daily life?? 

First, I want to make sure that I am reaching out to everyone in my circle.  I love how Pastor Matt put it today.  "Accept Them, Affirm Them, Assist Them".  (You can hear more about it here.)  This needs to happen in my every day life.

Second, I am thinking about what I could be doing outside of my normal circle. 

I have some ideas, and you will hopefully hear about them soon.  In the meantime, I would love to hear how you reach out of your circle!

Do you spend time with the kids around you like my friend's J&J or A?
Do you reach out through the scouting program like my friend L?
Do you work with a local food pantry or help families in need?

If you do, please share - someone else might be looking for an opportunity!

Thailand Update

For those who may be interested, I updated my Thailand page.

http://choosingcourage.blogspot.com/p/learn-more-about-our-thailand-trip.html

Regards,
Karla

Final Day Feelings

This week has been a stretch emotionally, mentally, and physically.  I have not been able to keep up this blog, and for those at home, I apologize.  Next week I will get some details up for you, but today I wanted to share some thoughts on our final day.

It is our last official day, and as we live out some ministry opportunities and prepare for our last night in the red light district, I find that I am both ready and not ready to return home.  I have learned and experienced so much, that I want to keep going.  At the same time, I miss my family and friends and want to personally share my story with them.  But what will I say?

Bangkok has become comfortable. A place I once feared is now a place I want to be.  Girls I once would have ignored or looked down on are loved. Women I didn't know are now cherished.
 
My personal feelings, beliefs, and limitations have been stretched and in some cases, broken.  But, they are so much stronger for the way God has soothed and mended them.  I am so thankful for each stretched or broken feeling, belief, and self imposed limitation. I am incredibly grateful for the new knowledge, joy, security, and assurance I have found in this process and love seeing them come alive in my daily life.

Lastly, our leader, Connie, said early on that although we came to minister (which we did), we would each be ministered to as well.  She was so right.  Whether it was the worship or the prayer, the women's stories or the girls' eyes, the laughter or the tears - my heart and eyes have been opened.  And I have been blessed beyond measure.

I know this is not the end of my story.  But regardless of who or what God puts in my path or where that path goes, I pray that I remember what I learned here.  Simply put:  to step out, take a chance, risk being broken, love others, and allow others to minister to me.  

Our first full ministry day in Thailand - Sunday, May 26

Today was officially our first full ministry day.  I won't be including any pictures as our leader asked us to just absorb and not take any pictures. We started the day with a guest house breakfast.  It was a small buffet.  There was soup, a noodle dish, and poached eggs.  They also had some fruit and yogurt.

We then went to a local Anglican church.  It was a really great service (although not the typical Springbrook service.) We also had the opportunity to take communion, which made it special. 
 
The group then went to an Indian restaurant for lunch and our leader provided us an overview of what else to expect this week. After that we went on a walk through the red light district and our leader explained the locations and people we would be seeing.

This afternoon we had a couple of hours of free time.  My lack of sleep finally caught up to me and I crashed for a good hour and a half. Tonight we walked around the district again to experience the vendor setup.  The main street went from almost a deserted alley look to an open air market. We then had dinner at the local McDs! (the receipt called it McThai.) :-) It was nice to have that touch of home.

Late tonight we headed back to the district. It was raining, so many people who would normally have been present were not. God provided several blessings in that with the lack of business as one. The second is more physical. With the rain, the sidewalks and streets were incredibly slippery. Everyone made it safely back to the guest house.

If you think to pray for us, please pray for us physically.  We are really struggling with the heat.  In addition, some of have some little aches and pains that are making the days more difficult. Lastly, as we debrief each evening, we are all evaluating our reactions, our personal lessons learned as well as how our heavenly relationship is changed. For some, this is significant. Please remember all 29 of us on our responses.

In love, Karla

Saturday, May 25. Thailand

Thailand Saturday, May 25th

Well, our Saturday is drawing to a close. It is currently almost 11pm. We are waiting for the rest of our team to arrive and will then have our kick-off worship and meeting! In the meantime, let me tell you what all happened today.

 I woke up incredibly early (5:30) with no reason. So after only 3 1/2 hours of sleep, I was wide awake. I used the time to decompress and pray for the day and week ahead. The SCC 5 met for breakfast in the hotel.

Look Colin, Bacon!

Then, we took a taxi over to the Weekend open air market. Our driver was awesome and we got to see some interesting sights on the way. At the market we picked up some souvenirs and then went into the next door mall for lunch. (I had a mocha chip cone for lunch, Yum!)

Mocha chip. 

We headed back to the hotel where we freshened up and then headed to the Guest House. Connie and Kristen "checked" us in and then we went to dinner with them and one other group that was also in. Tomorrow we are supposed to go to church, then rest, then go our for ministry tomorrow night.

Our Room

Our Room from the door

Chicken curry for dinner

 Thank you for the prayers, Karla

Thailand Day 1 - May 23rd/24th

Wow, what an exciting 1st day. I woke up at 6AM, feeling fairly rested which is really good since I didn't go to bed very early.  I finished packing my carry on and Colin and I left at 8 to pick up Christine.  Then we headed to Lisa's to meet up with the rest of the group.

John P led us in an amazing group prayer and the guys took pictures of the group. By 9:15 we were pulling out of the driveway. It took us a little longer than normal to get to the airport, but we were ok.  Colin dropped us off at the International terminal and then we found out we had to leave from Terminal 1, the United terminal.  So, after a short train ride, a fairly uneventful check-in, and surprisingly quick security, we found ourselves at our gate with about an hour to wait.  The flight was slightly delayed, and we go off around 2pm.  (The pilot said we would make up the time in the air.)

We were ALL very thankful to have the Economy Plus seats.  That extra ~10" makes a surprising difference.  Most of us didn't really sleep.  A couple got some real rest and the others got some cat naps. So how do you fill a 13 hour flight?  Books, Movies, Making friendship bracelets and talking.  I think we each brought other things to do, but our seating arrangement made some of the things difficult.

 

photo by Amy P

We landed in Tokyo a little late but in enough time to touch base with home, get some waters, and pull ourselves together for the next part of the trip.  I think we all dreaded the thought of getting on another plane for any period of time.
The flight to Bangkok was less crowded.   Our seats were better group wise with Lisa and I on one side of an aisle, Amy and Rachel right across from us, and Christine just in front. Our plan was to stay awake for the last flight (6 hours) so that we would sleep well.  All of us ended up falling asleep for at least a couple of hours.  Even if it wasn't good sleep, our bodies needed it.

We landed just after 11PM Bangkok time on Friday night.  We exchanged a little bit of money, made it through Immigration, picked up all 5 bags! And made it to the hotel a little after 12.  I was impressed with how smooth that part went. We spent the night at the Novatel which is right at the airport.  The rooms were comfortable and we were able to call and text with our loved ones. 

Tomorrow we plan to do some site seeing, relax, and get to our official residence (the Bangkok Christian Guest House) about 5PM to meet our leader, Connie.
It is kind of surreal to realize, we are in Bangkok. 6 months ago, we each had a unique experience and agreed to this trip.  To find ourselves here, 6 months later - to know that on Saturday, we will become part of a group of 29 women who came here to serve other women.  That is mind blowing.


We continue to covet your prayers.  We can feel them and know that is why we arrived here safely.  Thank you all,
With Love and Prayers,
Karla